As I ran emergent through Boulder this morning in 3121 on the way to a rollover accident in 4mile Canyon I waited for the mega-adrenaline-hit to come and shake my core. But it never came. I felt calm, and super-aware as if the world was moving slow and I was navigating through it as I plotted a course through intersections frozen by my siren. It was different than my 1^st Emergent Run. Or any other run I have had since and reminded me of watching Scott send the Jurassic Park Highline a week ago.

It was a strikingly beautiful area overlooking Lilly Lake and staged at the knees of Long’s Peak. Words don’t do much to describe such a place, so here are the photos.

Watching Scott prep for the walk was like watching anyone about ready to do something requiring every fiber of concentration and presence in the here/now moment.

I do it now to remember the feeling. A deep breath in through the nose, eyes clothes on the inhale, open on the exhale through pursed lips. One more, eyes open this time with a little movement in chest, fingers and toes to bring the presence into the body. This ritual brings me from grand thoughts of the universe back to the body that I occupy.

Driving emergent this morning was far from routine, and yet, the adrenaline is no longer at the edge of my control. It helps me be present without the inclusion of a single breath of fear.

Scott has mastered this with highlining, he is one of the few people with such control, and yet replaying my emergent run this morning, I know I can do the same.

In a sense, it is a loss, because that is why we all search for something extreme, to feel that rush, that extra-human experience, where adrenaline pushes us outside ourself into another world.

In another sense, it is the accidental goal achieved without consent, a wonderfully perfect surprise. Through becoming comfortable with sitting on the knife edge of existence one brings the entire external adrenaline-filled world into oneself. With those few deep breaths the high-speed adrenaline-universe and the peaceful internal-space become one, and our consciousness explodes and expands to encompass all.

As I sat there in the middle of the line and got ready to stand up, my thoughts ran away to the last time at the Golden Highline on a Ninja Night Adventure with Said and Scott. This time too, I stood, fell, bounced, and hung. It wasn’t the insane dark fearful chaos of last time, but despite months of processing and practice I still was not prepared for the mental clap egged on by the physics of gravity, and the human response to falling.

My huge whip

 Watching the rigging

One of the most strikingly positive things that occurred that day, was the teamwork of people who supported the limits-push. Amazing people, all together seeking new, extraordinary experiences and bouncing meaning and purpose in an epic teamwork send.

Rigging team

View down

The classic climb with michael on belay

Up the classic climb

Jurassic park

Scott poised to stand

Scott contemplates

Said wrote an amazing post as well with some stellar pics. (the one of me taking a whipper is from there)